two person shaking hands

Great Handshakes (Part 2 of 2)

Please read the first part here!

 

Continuation:

 

Go for the thumb

Keep your hand open and make sure your handshake will be a hand shake, not a finger or palm shake. This means getting the joint of your thumb nestled into the joint of their thumb. The lower joint, the tissue between your thumb to your forefinger. This allows you to truly have a full handshake.

Firm, not strong

A good handshake is firm but not overpowering. It isn’t the precursor to a wrestling match, and it doesn’t feel like a dead fish. Do you wanted to be handed or greeted with a dead fish? I doubt it! Always make your grip firm, but make adjustments based on the firmness of the other person’s grip.

Up and down, not back and forth

A good handshake has a nice up and down motion, not a back and forth one. As if you were jointly trying to saw some wood. Again, adjust the motion to what seems natural and comfortable to the other person.

 Adjust duration

Some people prefer a long handshake, others prefer them much shorter. Observe the other person and adjust the duration to the situation, how well you know the person, and what seems comfortable to them.

Consider your left hand

While it may not be appropriate in some cultures, I often use my other hand to grasp the other side of the person’s hand or to touch their arm. This gesture makes the handshake warmer and more personal. When I am trying to convey those feelings I include my left hand as well. You might consider doing that too.

Close with eye contact and a smile

If the smile and eye contact hasn’t continued throughout the handshake, finish it out that way.

 

After re-reading and thinking about these several times, I realized that the deeper key to handshakes (as with many things in life) is intention.

Keep your focus on the other person, and you will naturally do many of the things on the list. You will make the handshake a natural part of your connection process. Make an eye contact. You will smile and connect. Naturally adjust your grip and focus on the other person.

As a leader or a person responsible for interacting with Customers in any way, the value of this skill is obvious. The fact is though that having a great handshake is a life skill we should all cultivate. It matters to us in creating first impressions and in building relationships.

 

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two persons about to initiate a handshake

Great Handshakes (Part 1 of 2)

Something we do often, then forget about it

It’s something most of us do often. We shake hands. We shake hands with long-time friends, with old acquaintances and with brand-new people. Shaking hands here and shaking hands there.

I took a class in college where they taught us how to shake hands. I remember thinking at the time, maybe more than 20 years ago. That everyone should know how shakes hands effectively.

Then, as I reflected, I realized that I had shaken more than a few hands that needed those lessons. I thought then, and agree now that a friend taught me the basics and importance of good handshakes.

The first impression

In much of the world, the handshake is a part of the first impression that we make. People think about first impressions from a grooming and dress standpoint.

In business situations they practice what they might say. They often read books to learn what kinds of questions to ask to remain authentic and create a positive first impression.

And while all of that is important, it is the handshake, often overlooked and forgotten. That is the first physical information others receive about us at the early part of a relationship.

In other words, handshakes matter.

And a strong one can make a big difference.

An American colleague who has now been living and teaching in Japan for some time must agree. She emailed me and part of the email reads:

” Next week is the beginning of the school year – and I really want to get my new students off to the best possible start. Would you be willing to share your thoughts on how to give a really great handshake? I have been away from the U.S. for so long, and have few opportunities to practice (though my bowing has gotten really good :)) “

Here are the secrets to great handshakes, assembled to respond to her earnest request

Start with eye contact and a smile

A great handshake isn’t just about a physical gesture, it is about connecting with the other person. It is a physical greeting and you want to convey your pleasure in greeting the other person. The best way to do that is with your face and your eyes.

 

Continue reading the last part.

LIFE WELL-LIVED

 

I will not forget her smile, so sweet and can be tasted from the air, upon seeing us arriving at her doorsteps. Puzzled, she ask, “So how are you guys doing?”, as she kisses and embraces my mom.

We brought some rice cake, corn pudding and roasted chicken, which are all comfort food of my grandmom.

There is no occasion, we just decide to pay her a surprise visit in her house as my mom misses her.

At a glance, you will notice how difficult for her to stand up and walk and move, due to age and some health conditions, but the same glance it is obvious how strong the woman is.

Way back when my siblings and I were growing up, my parents used to bring us to our grandmom’s residence in Manila or in her Fruit Store in GSIS office. I remember one time when we eat up all the available bananas in her fruit stand, and instead of getting angry, grandmom disciplined us with a sweet smile.

All her life, she is working hard to support some of her children and her grandchildren. A lot of times, she is too busy doing things for a living and she almost always forget to have a life.

Sometimes, we would invite her over for an out-of-town family get away to relax and have fun.

She is a real champion of hard-work, and it never fails her.

We can also enjoy our work. King Solomon advised “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your strength, for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in the grave, where we will go” (vv. 10)”. Whatever our job or role in life, we can still do things that matter, and do them very well. We can encourage people, pray, and express love each day.

The Wise King also told us, “Time and chance happen to them all… No one knows when our lives on earth will end, but gladness and purpose can be found in this day by relying on God’s strength and depending on Jesus’ promise of eternal life (John 6:47)

Grandmom Ofelia reminds me to live each day well. Death is a reminder of life, and life is a gift. King Solomon said, “Anyone who is among the living has hope (Ecclesiastes 9:4). Life on Earth gives us the chance to influence and enjoy the world around us. We can eat and drink happily and relish our relationships” (vv. 7, 9).

To my grandmom, who is now goes back to her Creator, we would like to thank you for the opportunity you gave us to live, for all the lessons you taught, and for the unconditional love you brought. We will surely MISS BEING WITH YOU.

UPDATE:

Today is the first year death anniversary of my grandmom.

UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE (PART 1 OF 2)

 

This is a good story and is true, please read it all the way through until the end!

 

Breakfast at McDonald’s.

I am a mother of three (ages 14, 12, 3) and have recently completed my college degree. The last class I had to take was Sociology.

The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human being had been graced with. Her last project of the term was called, ‘Smile.’

The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions. I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway. So, I thought this would be a piece of cake, literally.

Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son, and I went out to McDonald’s one crisp March morning.

It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son. We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away, and then even my husband did.

I did not move an inch… an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside of me as I turned to see why they had moved.

As I turned around I smelled a horrible ‘dirty body’ smell, and there standing behind me were two poor homeless men.

As I looked down at the short gentleman, close to me, he was ‘smiling’

His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of God’s Light as he searched for acceptance

He said, ‘Good day’ as he counted the few coins he had been clutching.

The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyed gentleman was his salvation.

I held my tears as I stood there with them.

The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted.

He said, ‘Coffee is all Miss’ because that was all they could afford. (If they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something. He just wanted to be warm).

 

CONTINUE READING HERE!