Tag: problem

Problem Solving With Reality Therapy (Part 3 of 3)

Do not dare to miss out the recent articles. Read them below:

Problem Solving With Reality Therapy (Part 1 of 3)

Problem Solving With Reality Therapy (Part 2 of 3)

 

Continuation:

 

Assessment of the current behavior

The next step is the most crucial in the entire process. In the next step the helper asks helpees if their current behavior is likely to get them what they say they want.

This is the step where the helper comforts the afflicted and afflicts the comfortable. If the person is already aware that what he is doing is not working, then they are already in distress. They are ready to try something different. So the helper comforts the afflicted by helping them find a solution.

Otherwise if the person is unaware that he needs help, this will be the step that drives the point home. Answering this question is likely to afflict the comfortable by holding up a mirror of their own behavior.

Ask if it is likely to be effective in getting what he or she wants. If the answer is no, then they generally experience enough discomfort to at least look at some alternatives.

The final step

The final step in the Reality Therapy process is to help the helpee come up with a plan. He then will tend to do something more effective. This is best accomplished by helping the person focus on those things. Things that are within his or her control—his or her own thoughts and actions.

We don’t help a depressed person by simply saying, “Cheer up!” People cannot directly control their feelings but they can directly control their actions and thinking.

Similarly, people like to focus their time and attention on what others could and should do. This will give them what they want but attempting to control others is generally a fruitless activity.

Helping people to focus on changing their own behavior and thoughts is generally the goal of Reality Therapy.

 

Of course there are many subtle nuances to the process. I have only provided a thumbnail sketch of the method. But you can easily see a variety of applications as mentioned in the introduction to this article.

 

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Problem Solving With Reality Therapy (Part 2 of 3)

Read more about the Reality Therapy. Go back to recent article in case you missed it. Please check out the link below:

Problem Solving With Reality Therapy (Part 1 of 3)

 

Continuation:

 

After creating this need-satisfying environment and working hard to maintain it throughout the relationship, the helper can move on to the actual problem.

Hear the person’s story

The helper needs to determine what the ideal solution. And what would it look like from the other person’s point of view.

For example, if the person were complaining about a fight he have with his girlfriend. Ask the question, “What do you want to happen? How do you want this to work out?”

It is critical to get a specific picture of what the ideal solution will look like from the perspective of the person experiencing the problem. The helper is leading him or her away from the problem and into a problem-solution mode.

In this way, the focus is off the past and the problem, which cannot be changed. The focus instead is on the behavior the person can create to move himself in the direction of the solution he wants.

Inventory of ‘things’

The next step is to take an inventory of things the person is doing to attempt to get the situation to work out the way he wants. The helper asks the person to list the steps he is taking to move closer to his or her goal.

Typically, the person will only list positive things. But the helper needs to ask them to consider everything he is doing. Something he do that is both helping and hindering his or her progress.

It is even acceptable for the helper to add in some observations of his or her own. The point is to get as complete a picture as possible. In addition to considering one’s outward behavior, ask about their thoughts, feelings and physiology (if appropriate), as well.

 

Continue reading:

Problem Solving With Reality Therapy (Part 3 of 3)

Solution To A Problem (Part 2 of 2)

Miss out the first article? Read it here.

 

Continuation:

 

Write down the question, and then come up with a one-sentence solution to that from them. The solution should be a general statement of what will solve the problem. From here you can develop the solution further, and increase its complexity little by little.

Be creative

Although it helps to have critical thinking aboard as you solve a problem, you must also keep a creative, analytical voice at the back of your head. When someone comes up with a prospective solution, tried to think how you could make that solution work. Try to be creative. At the same time, look for chinks in the armor of that solution.

There may be more solutions compare to problems

It pays to remember that there may be more than just one solution being developed at one time. Try to keep track of all the solutions and their developments. Remember, there may be more than just one solution to the problem.

Listen

Remember that old adage,” two heads are better than one.” That one is truer than it sounds. Always be open to new ideas. You can only benefit from listening to all the ideas each person has. This is especially true when the person you’re talking to has had experience solving problems similar to yours.

You don’t have to be a gung-ho, solo hero to solve the problem. If you can organize collective thought on the subject, it would be much better.

Be patient

As long as you persevere, there is always a chance that a solution will present itself. Remember that no one was able to create an invention the first time around.

Some exercises

Creative thinking exercises can also help you in your quest be a more creative problems solver.

Here is one example:

Take a piece of paper and write any word that comes to mind at the center. Now look at that word then write the first two words that come to your mind. This can go on until you can build a tree of related words. This helps you build analogical skills, and fortify your creative processes.

 

So, next time you see a problem you think you can not solve, think again. The solution might just be staring you right in the face. All it takes is just a little creative thinking, some planning, and a whole lot of work.

 

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Solution To A Problem (Part 1 of 2)

End of the world?

How many times have you caught yourself saying that there could be no other solution to a problem? Then that problem leads to a dead end? How many times have you felt stumped knowing that the problem laying before you is one you cannot solve.

No leads, no other options and seemed there are no solutions.

Did it feel like you had exhausted all possible options? Yet are still before the mountain so large, unconquerable, and impregnable?

When encountering such enormous problems, you may feel like you’re hammering against a steel mountain. The pressure of having to solve such a problem may be overwhelming.

But rejoice. There might be some hope

With some creative problem-solving techniques you may be able to look at your problem in a different light. And that light might just be the end of the tunnel that leads to possible solutions.

First of all, in the light of creative problem-solving, you must be open-minded to the fact that there may be more than just one solution to the problem. And, you must be open to the fact that there may be solutions to problems you thought were unsolvable.

Now, with this optimistic mindset, we can try to be a little bit more creative in solving our problems.

Identify the problem

Maybe the reason we cannot solve our problems is that we have not really taken a hard look at what the problem is. Here, trying to understanding the problem and having a concrete understanding of its workings is integral solving the problem.

If you know how it works, what the problem is, then you have a better foundation towards solving the problem.

Not trying to make the simple statement of what problem is. Try to identify the participating entities and what their relationships with one another are.

Take note of the things you stand to gain any stand to lose from the current problem. Now you have a simple statement of what the problem is.

Take note of the constraints and assumptions

Try to take note of all of the constraints and assumptions you have the words of problem. Sometimes it is these assumptions that obstruct our view of possible solutions. You have to identify which assumptions are valid, in which assumptions need to be addressed.

Divide and conquer

Try to solve the problem by parts. Solve it going from general view towards the more detailed parts of the problem. This is called the top-down approach.

 

Continue reading the last part.

Guilt and Self-Destructive Behaviors (Part 4 of 4)

Please read the very informative first, second and third part.

 

Continuation:

 

Did you act like the member of the indigenous tribe and make sacrifices to appease your gods (okay, parents)? Did you change something normal in yourself in order to not hurt them again? Was the result that you resented yourself for appeasing your parents at your own expense?

If so, your resentment will also have you trapped in self-defeating responses as you go through life. What might that look like? You might rebel against the mother in the joke and become unresponsive to anyone who wants your interest.

Or, in response to a controlling parent, you might become stubborn, defiant, and disagreeable, no matter how severe the cost is to you. Throughout your life these qualities will undermine your relationships with others and also your goals.

Congratulations, You’ve Been Hired by Mystery Firm

Changing to keep our parents happy, or at least to not make them angry, is something you may have tried while growing up. But did you know exactly what you were changing and why? And if you didn’t, did you still try to change anyway?

Compare your situation to this one and see if it helps put it all in perspective for you. You’ve been job-hunting for a while and now at last your search is over. You’ve landed a job.

Only problem is, you don’t know what the job entails, the expectations of you, and what the requirements actually are. One day you walk into work and your boss is angry with you and you don’t know why.

You find yourself thinking, “What did I do?” “Was it the way I handled report A, was it the way I dealt with situation B, or maybe it was how I dealt with customer C?”

You decide which situation you think it was and then you make what you think is the appropriate change. Next time, you think (and hope) it will be different. Your boss will have nothing to be angry about.

You’ve taken care of the problem. Does that make sense to you? Changing but not knowing what you did wrong or fully understanding the situation before you start to make the change?

If you don’t know what the problem is, how can you possibly to fix it? To an adult this probably doesn’t make sense, does it? But this is what we, as kids, do.

Right or wrong, sense or nonsense, we try to change to make sure our parents (or other siblings) won’t be angry or hurt. We’re always trying to keep those “gods” of ours happy so they don’t get angry.

 

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