Tag: journey

Spiritual Growth: The Spiritual Challenge of Modern Times (Part 2 of 2)

Do not miss the wonderful first part.

 

Continuation:

 

To grow spiritually is to search for meaning

Religions that believe in the existence of God such as Christianity, Judaism, and Islam suppose that the purpose of the human life is to serve the Creator of all things.

Several theories in psychology propose that we ultimately give meaning to our lives. Whether we believe that life’s meaning is pre-determined or self-directed, to grow in spirit is to realize that we do not merely exist.

We do not know the meaning of our lives at birth. We gain knowledge and wisdom from our interactions with people. Also from our actions and reactions to the situations we are in.

As we discover this meaning, there are certain beliefs and values that we reject and affirm. Our lives have purpose. This purpose puts all our physical, emotional, and intellectual potentials into use; sustains us during trying times; and gives us something to look forward to—a goal to achieve, a destination to reach.

A person without purpose or meaning is like a drifting ship at sea.

To grow spiritually is to recognize interconnections

Religions stress the concept of our relatedness to all creation, live and inanimate. Thus we call other people “brothers and sisters” even if there are no direct blood relations.

Moreover, deity-centered religions such as Christianity and Islam speak of the relationship between humans and a higher being. On the other hand, science expounds on our link to other living things through the evolution theory.

This relatedness is clearly seen in the concept of ecology, the interaction between living and non-living things. In psychology, connectedness is a characteristic of self-transcendence, the highest human need according to Maslow.

Recognizing your connection to all things makes you more humble and respectful of people, animals, plants, and things in nature. It makes you appreciate everything around you. This moves you to go beyond your comfort zone and reach out to other people. It become stewards of all other things around you.

 

Growth is a process thus to grow in spirit is a day-to-day encounter. We win some, we lose some, but the important thing is that we learn. From this knowledge, further spiritual growth is possible.

 

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Guilt and Self-Destructive Behaviors (Part 3 of 4)

Do not miss out the first and second part.

 

Continuation:

 

Chances are you’d know that if that person behaved badly, it wasn’t your fault. But with your parent or sibling, you’ve been blamed for their unhappiness over a long, long time and you’ve been burdened by long-lasting feelings of (unconscious) guilt.

Why is it so difficult to avoid feeling guilty toward your parents when you probably wouldn’t blame yourself for the badly behaving stranger?

The Gods Must Be Angry

As children, we view our parents in the same way that members of a primitive tribe view their gods. When the gods are angry, the heavens erupt and earthquakes, floods, and droughts occur.

Tribal elders know for certain that the gods must be appeased. Amends must be made for hurting the gods. With a lack of knowledge about the causes of the natural disasters it experiences, the tribe assumes that it has angered the gods of nature.

And so by altering its behavior through prayer, performing rituals and sacrifices, the tribe believes it can placate the offended gods and so alleviate the punishment.

But in altering its behavior in order to amend and atone, the tribe may make accommodations even if they’re detrimental to its well-being—for instance, sacrificing a cow even if there’s a shortage of cows.

In the same way, as a child you assumed that your behavior was responsible for provoking your parents. Though this assumption was often just a general feeling and not clearly well thought out, it was based on real experiences with siblings or parents who constantly acted hurt, threatened, or angered by your normal behaviors.

Remember the mother in the joke at the beginning of the chapter—the one who made her son feel guilty about not paying enough attention to her? Have you ever been in a similar situation? If so, what did you do?

 

Continue reading the last part.

Guilt and Self-Destructive Behaviors (Part 2 of 4)

Miss the first part? Read it here!

 

Continuation:

What’s the effect of all this knife twisting?

Maybe your fear of having too much devotion will cause you to be afraid of close relationships and so your search for love will never end well. In the chapter “Why Can’t I Fall in Love and Stay in Love,” you’ll read stories of people whose relationships were damaged by just this issue.

The Bludgeon

Let’s continue with our other style of guilt-provoking manipulation—the Bludgeon. An example of this type is when you act independently of your authoritarian parent and he or she loses control, explodes in anger, and screams at you because you weren’t obedient or submissive enough.

What’s the effect of bludgeoning?

In the chapter “Why Am I Fat and Why Can’t I Lose Weight?” you’ll read about Alice, who rebelled against her controlling parents by getting fat and staying that way.

Whether it’s a slowly twisting knife, a bludgeoning from a hammer, an icy stare or a cold shoulder, the effect of these over-emotional displays of exaggerated suffering is the same—to manipulate you to change a normal behavior or abandon a normal goal.

But why would you change what is normal and acceptable? Because you feel so guilty for inflicting such terrible pain, you’ll conform to their personality flaws no matter how resentful or damaging that may be for your life.

The Stranger at the Party

As a child, it’s hard to imagine that you have the power to inflict so much damage on your parents or siblings just by being yourself and doing the normal things that children do. But because they constantly act so wounded, it’s difficult for you to be unaffected by their guilt-provoking behavior.

Now think about this: If you had a brief encounter with an unpleasant stranger at a cocktail party, would you assume then that you were responsible for his offensive behavior? Or would you say to yourself, or to a friend, “What’s up with him?”

 

Continue reading:

Guilt and Self-Destructive Behaviors (Part 3 of 4)

Guilt and Self-Destructive Behaviors (Part 4 of 4)

 

Continuous Learning (Part 3 of 3)

Do not dare to miss out the wonderful first and second part.

 

Continuation:

 

Remain curious

One of the most powerful learning questions we use is “Why?” Why is the question of the curious. Continuous learners remain curious about people, places, important and mundane things as well.

They are adding to their knowledge and perspective by cultivating their curiosity. They also do an exercise to important part of our learning brain at the same time.

Learn in multiple ways

In school we learned in a limited number of ways. Unfortunately it leaves some people with a limited view of learning. Continuous learners know that they can learn by reading, by listening, by trying, through others, with a mentor, etc.

Teach others

Something magical happens when you teach someone something – you suddenly understand it better yourself. Continuous learners teach others. Not just to help the other person. Nor to show them how much they know. But mainly because they know it helps them deepen their mastery of their own learning.

How to Use This List

Now that you have read this far I hope you are convinced of how valuable it can be to be a more active learner. You have also read a list of characteristics. Now that you have read that list of characteristics, I’d like you to read it again. As you read it ask yourself these questions:

  1. How well do I stack up against these behaviors?
  2. Which ones would I like to get better at?
  3. Who do I know that is exceptionally good at each of these characteristics?
  4. How can I learn these traits and habits from those I know who are better at them than I?

Your answers to these four questions and the action that you take will put you on the road to being a more continuous and life-long learner.

Enjoy your journey.

 

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Secrets For Stress-Free Living (Part 4 of 4)

Do not miss out the first, second and third part.

 

Continuation:

 

It is important to limit your own responsibilities to prevent emotions like lack of self-worth etc. Remain present and in attendance to your own needs first and you will always give others your best, automatically.

You are not your accomplishments

Understand that you are not your accomplishments. What you do and don’t do, your beliefs, ideas, possessions, are nothing to do with who you really are. They are the baggage you have picked up along the way.

They are nothing to do with the spiritual you who wants to feel good. Stay connected to peace. Lose your ego, and take this attitude of freedom with you in your everyday life.

The journey is the destination

Many times we say “If only I had x, then I would be happy”. Or “I’ll be happy when I’ve got this…”

As you go into the world and experience the contrast of your likes and dislikes, through your everyday experiences, so a new want is born. Then comes struggle in the journey towards its manifestation.  It contains all the stresses and strains you wish to rid yourself of. Understand this: you’ll never get it done.

The journey itself towards your wants shows you new elements of contrast.  It got new possibilities, new likes and dislikes, that change and alter your path. Thus your job here is not to get caught up in the end result but to ensure you enjoy the journey along the way, regardless of your goal.

Your everyday journey contains all the same underlying experiences, emotions, and full-body feelings that you seek from your end goal. The journey is the destination. So enjoy it.

Bringing it all together

So how do we overcome the various stress blocks to pull greater peace and abundance towards us? Once the biggest unconscious blocks are resolve, your intentions, ambitions, passion will feel that much free to move towards you, automatically and effortlessly.

Circumstances and people appear in your life from nowhere and events begin aligning themselves, as the universe conspires with you, to realize your passion.

 

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