Category: Self Help

How to Survive Being Overwhelmed

Know Your Purpose

Know your vision, your goals, and your plans because these help you set priorities. Each day, identify the task you must accomplish and make that your top priority.

Also, set aside time to invest in your future, working on important things that you will need later. If you have yet to write out your priorities, then take time to do this. It could be the most important hour that you spend in your life.

Say No

Be fiercely protective of your time. Make sure each new commitment adds value for you. Do what is necessary and then stop. Rather than ask yourself “What can I do?” ask “What can I not do?”

Avoid low value tasks, new projects, and distractions. Then tell people about your decisions. Huge amounts of effort are wasted by people trying to complete tasks that someone else decided to ignore.

Schedule Life

Even if you ride an accelerating treadmill you can step off once in a while. Leave work at 5:00 p.m. on Friday. Take Saturday or Sunday off. Give yourself a two minute break when you close your eyes, rub your neck, or meditate.

Set a date with family members for a meal or an activity (hint: put this date on your calendar as if it were an important business appointment, because it is).

Protect Yourself

When you’re tired, your efficiency falters. Thus, eat healthy foods. Get enough sleep. Avoid toxic habits. Exercise (use the stairs, do crunches or push ups in your office, take a five minute yoga break). If possible, schedule exercise as if it were a business appointment.

Be Efficient

Spend time only with people who add value to your life. Buy only from companies that provide adequate support. Hold effective meetings. Decline invitations to meetings without an agenda (I guarantee these will accomplish nothing).

Avoid conflicts; they always cost time to repair. Keep your cool; anger always costs you more than what it achieves. Take a moment to plan before starting a task.

 

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Conflict Mistakes

What do I do when I’ve “blown it?”

One of the questions I receive most often from my newsletter subscribers is what do I do when I’ve “blown it?”

As one good friend said: I forgot all the great ways I know to address a conflict. I reprimanded an employee by basically attacking her character. I did apologize, and, thankfully, she is not quitting. But things feel awkward, and I’m wondering if there’s something I can do to help the situation besides apologize.

Apologize

First, this person did just the right thing—she apologized, and she didn’t wait too long to do it. It’s important to remember that we all react occasionally in ways that we think better of later.

Once you apologize, give it time. Continue to center, breathe, smile, and treat the employee with respect.

In addition, hold the vision that with time your relationship will be back on the right track. Visualize how you want the relationship to look as you continue to work together, and begin acting on that vision in your daily communication.

Think of a physical wound

It takes time to heal. While it’s healing, you treat the wound gently, keep it clean, maybe smooth some cream on it to help the healing process.

It’s the same with healing a relationship

Keep your communication clean, gentle, and yet honest and direct. Say hello, how’s it going? Treat her as you would under normal circumstances, yet with the awareness of what did occur.  You don’t pretend the conflict never happened, but you don’t have to abase yourself either.

It’s only not up to us

Finally, remember that it’s not only up to you. You have a part in this, and so does she, you cannot do her part for her, you can only do yours. If you give the employee room, she will find her way back to the strong connection that once existed.

 

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Nightmares

Awoooooh!!!

Nightmares are the type of dream everyone fears and wants to avoid. By their nature, these dreams are fearful, but often they need to be faced.

The mind may be presenting them to us in such a dramatic manner because we have ignored a message for a prolonged period of time and it’s resorting to more drastic means to get our attention.

The truth is, many nightmares are actually gifts that we should be thankful for because they are trying to help us.

Avoidance is the wrong response

The strong emotions evoked by these intense dreams are cries for help, and like a baby crying in the night for attention … they will not be denied.

The longer you ignore them, the louder they will get! Therefore ignoring nightmares is not only the wrong response, it’s impractical in that it will make them worse.

Sometimes the subconscious mind will work with your nightmares to bring resolutions without you being consciously aware of the entire process. But when nightmares become recurring, then it’s a sign that your conscious attention is being sought.

It’s more common to wake up in the middle of a nightmare than during a regular dream. It’s also more common to remember a nightmare. This is, again, by design as a way of trying to get your attention.

The best way to get rid of a recurring nightmare is to deal with it – that is to deal with the issue it’s presenting.

It will take some courage, but here are some tips on how to do it:

  1. Rather than turning and shooting a monster or “bad guy” that is chasing you, it’s better to turn and ask the aggressor how you can help it. Use such questions as “What is it you want to tell me,” or “How can I help you help me?”
  2. Come up with solutions by asking other “cast members” in the dream what resolution they would like to see.
  3. Bring your Spiritual Guide into the dream and ask for his/her suggestions.

Nightmares may also be caused by trauma, psychiatric problems or drugs (both legal and illegal). In such cases the care of a health care professional should be sought immediately.

 

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Rest and Sleep

The human body

All the parts of the human body work together, although each one has its especial part to do. The stomach must have a time to rest between meals. The other parts of the body require rest, too.

This they usually get while we are asleep. We must not be neglectful and fail to give them enough rest, or they will soon get worn out and give us trouble.

Things that may help induce sleep

Sometimes, when people are not well or are all tired out, they find they cannot sleep well at night. There are a number of little things that can be done to induce sleep.

A warm bath before retiring, followed by a gentle massage, especially along the spine, often will, by relaxing the nerves and muscles, produce very good results.

A hot foot bath, which draws the blood away from the brain, frequently will be found beneficial. A glass of hot milk or cocoa, taken just before retiring, often will have the same effect.

If the sleeplessness is a result of indigestion, a plain diet will relieve. Sleeping upon a hard bed without any pillow sometimes produces the desired effect.

Always have plenty of fresh air in the room. Keep the mind free from the cares of the day. If they will intrude, crowd them out by repeating something else some soothing sentence or bit of poetry.

Another technique

One good plan is to close the left nostril by pressing on it with the finger, then take four deep breaths through the right nostril. Then close the right nostril and take four deep breaths through the left one. Repeat this about four times. Then breathe slowly through both nostrils, but count your breaths. You seldom will count very many.

Never take any sleeping powders or tablets except upon the advice of a physician, for they usually contain drugs that will injure the heart.

Stress and rest

You will find that you will meet a number of men who are stressed. That means they have no control over their emotions. But let them run away with them.

Sometimes this is shown in palpitation of the heart, headache, backache, and many other disorders. There may be a tendency to cry at trivial things, or a feeling of having “the blues.”

The cause usually can be found in uncongenial surroundings or occupation, loss of love ones, or real or fancied troubles. Whatever the cause, it should be removed, if possible, and measures taken to restore the worn out nerves that are crying for rest or food.

Tonics help, so does nourishing food, such as eggs and milk; also a change of environment, if possible. A man who is stressed frequently does not realize what is the cause of his condition, and considers only the symptoms.

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Are You Trapped By Old Beliefs?

Let’s take a look at our beliefs

Have you ever wondered what kinds of beliefs you have stored away in your unconscious? Beliefs that silently influence your choices? Take a good look at your life. Take a look to your friends, your loved ones, your job, and even your health.

The life you currently live is a reflection of your beliefs about what you are willing to accept and tolerate. This is the vital difference that separates people who live abundant happy lives from those who don’t.

For instance, people who continue to stay in abusive relationships. People who work at jobs they don’t enjoy. Or people struggle financially, do so as a result of the beliefs they hold.

Yet there are individuals in society who will never ever accept being unjustly treated. They are living just above the poverty line. Working in professions that do not make full use of their gifts.

But there are individuals who stand out in the crowd. The entrepreneurs, pioneers, and leaders who refuse to allow the opinions of others to dictate how they live their lives.

They do this not because they are better or more gifted than everyone else. They do it simply because their beliefs do not allow them to do otherwise.

We should play an active role in the creation of our beliefs

It is important to remember that we all play an active role in the creation of our belief systems. Even if this occurs when we are vulnerable to the influence of others.

Once these beliefs are impressed on our unconscious mind, they become the rule book that controls the direction of our lives.

All your successes and failures, then, are in some way influenced by this unconscious set of rules you have written. Whatever it is you wish to achieve. Whether it be a skill you’re attempting to master.

A subject you wish to learn or an illness you are struggling to overcome. Remember that your success will be determined by a single factor. It is the unconscious beliefs that make up your book of rules.

Much of the struggle you experience in life relates to the inner turmoil you feel when you make a new choice. It usually conflicts with the set of rules you have created about life and simply forgotten.

To end this struggle and become the master of your own destiny. You must therefore master the unconscious beliefs that control you.

 

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